Balancing Creativity and Motherhood

When I started My Submarine To The Future blog it was more of a creative diary for myself- a place to chronicle my endeavors as I worked towards the goal of trying to squeeze a little art and creativity into my already chock-a-block busy day.

In just a few short months though, that changed.


The biggest difference?... I was no longer flying solo! You guys now accompany me on all my arty adventures! Sometimes you even send me questions, like the following one….

“I love the projects you show on your blog. Being a not-so-creative Mom, I am impressed but have a few questions…”

The message came from Puneet Singh (a busy mother of two and a regular reader). I asked Puneet if she would mind me posting her questions (and my answers) about balancing art and motherhood on the blog and she was happy to oblige. Thanks Puneet!

Puneet: How do you work on these projects with your 3 year old, as the patience level and attention span at that age is limited?

Jackie: Sometimes the serene photos of my son sitting, focused and happily painting don’t always tell the whole story of how our art experiences go down (check out - When Good Craft Goes Bad!). Often making art with him can feel tantamount to teaching a wild cat how to draw! One minute he’s up on the table, the next he’s down on the floor. He’s knocking over water jars. Trying to mess around with things he shouldn't (sharp scissors!) and tying up furniture with string. Yes, it can be tricky, to say the least!

Despite this there are ways, I've found, to encourage a more enjoyable crafting experience. Here are 5 tips that can help….
1) Gauge the activity - if there is a particular project you want to do with your child then ask yourself what parts of it can he really handle? Is there painting he can do? Gluing? Collage? How can he assist? Is the project age appropriate? If not, manage the project so that he can help with the parts he is able to and you can assist with the rest.

2) Keep your expectations in check - Art and crafting should be fun! Be sure to remember it’s a “no pressure zone”. If the project is not turning into what it is “supposed to be” don’t worry about it. You may have intended to build a house with your child and then it ended up being a robot. Who cares! Your child got to create with you, had fun and learned he can make another cool thing out of a cardboard box.

3) Be selective about the timing of your creative moments - I’ve learned the hard way not to craft just before lunch, or nap time. Time flies when you’re creating and before you know it your child is wailing for food (or sleep) and you’re trying to clean up wandering paint splattered hands while also freaking out about getting the chicken nuggets in the oven.

4) Keep it informal - Have you ever noticed that when you start working on something independently, your child will immediately investigate? Try assembling a piece of furniture with a 3 year old around and you’ll see what I mean. They get right in there pulling out screws, trying to take the screwdriver from your hands. They want to do what you do! Apply this method to your art projects. Unannounced, take a sheet of paper out and some art materials. Set up a still life (just A Bowl Of Apples will do) and start sketching. Your child will be over there in a shot to check it out and, most likely, will want to join in too.

5) Go with the flow - sometimes when I’m crafting with my son we’ll take breaks. We both may stop and leave whatever we are making to do something else, only to return to it a little later. Or, he may just get up leaving me to continue working alone. I find when this happens (especially if it is a slightly longer project) he will often return when I’ve moved on to another stage of the project construction (e.g. he may be more interested in the painting part, rather than the building). I will try to finish it so that he can see the project through to the end. Sometimes that can happen in ten minutes, an hour, a day or even a week! It all depends on how busy I am. For me the most important thing is to have him experience the creative process.

Puneet: What about space? I have limited space. I can’t dedicate a room or even my dining table to a project because it is needed at the next mealtime. Yes, no backyard, no patio, no attic and no basement (just driving home my space point). How do you handle “work- in progress”? Where does it go?

Jackie: That's a tough one, but there are a couple of ways around it. Sounds simple but a plain old cardboard box can do the trick! When you’ve finished working on a project for the day (or even if it's still in progress but you're out of time) store everything in a box. When you come back to work on it, just pull the box out again. You will be able to pick up where you left off. For wet, glued, or painted work I recommend making full use of your walls. Set up a clothes line. You can use a length of string strung across one of your walls and clip clothes pins (pegs) on to it. Hang up any "in-progress" artwork to dry. It also makes for a great wall display for your kids finished pieces too.

Puneet: On a similar note, how does one, rather where does one store all the supplies?

Jackie: When you’ve got a small space organization is key. Collect various jam jars and other recycled containers to hold pens, crayons and collage materials. I keep a large tub for all our paint supplies and an old mug to hold brushes. Most of this stuff, I store up on a shelf together. Again, don't overlook your wall space.

The hardest things to store are the packaging materials for some of the projects I make (e.g. the recycled cardboard boxes). If they are large I flat pack them (sliding them behind a piece of furniture to store and use later). For the smaller boxes try to use them as and when they become available – often what I have on hand inspires the project I will do that day. I'm quite frugal (read: cheap. Ha!) when it comes to buying materials and like to try to use the things I have lying around.

Puneet: What if the project end product doesn’t turn out as nifty as expected? Are you troubled with toddler accusations –“this is not how a …. looks like”, or “ these puppet stings break every time I pull them” and so on.
Jackie: Kids are quite forgiving (thankfully!) but the few times I have been called out by my son, I turn it back on him. Ask your child “What do you think we can do, or use, to make it better?” Try to involve them in finding an inventive solution. That way it’s not about the level of skill or crafting ability of the adult, but the creative thought process of the child.

Puneet: Could you do more quickie projects for younger kids – easy to do, instant gratification? Like your cute spider web plate in the Oct. 2010 post?

Jackie: Inspired by your request I am currently working on some ideas now! In the meantime check out this previous post for Simple Games to keep the kids entertained.

Puneet: And the most important question of all – how do you carve out the time to do all this in a Mom’s chore heavy day?
Jackie: It’s really tough! I’d love to say it happens spontaneously but, honestly, I find the best way is to schedule it in. Almost like a class in your own home. I set aside an hour (*see note below) where I say "I'm just going to focus on creating something with my son". I try not to listen to the nagging voice in my head saying “the laundry needs doing” or “the dishes need washing” and I try to spend the time focusing on just being creative. If I don't make time for it, it just won't happen.

*Just to clarify, please note that although I set aside an hour for creative time, I don't expect my son to paint and draw for the full hour (he's a toddler of course, so 5 or 10 minute bursts are more the reality). An hour is just the time I allot for us in the day to set up, do creative activities, take breaks, start up again and then clean up.

Now, with regards to my own individual art projects and creative ventures (those done without my son) I find making time for those much harder. I'm currently trying to use this "scheduling" technique to give myself more opportunity to be creative. Sometimes, unfortunately, my inspiration doesn't always coincide with my self allocated time slot but I still try to push myself to do it because I'm not sure when my next chance will be. Since becoming a mother, my personal time has become so precious to me. When I do have a free afternoon all to myself I almost become incapacitated trying to think about what I should do with it!... Shopping? Gym? Meeting friends? Reading? Watch a movie? Writing? Sleeping!? Pedicure? Or draw and paint? Art often gets relegated to the bottom of the pile. I'm striving to change that. I guess, I'm a work in progress :)

Thank you again Puneet. Great questions!

I would love to hear how you moms (and dads) out there balance creativity and parenthood. Any hints, tips or suggestions that you can share on how you fit it in your busy lives? Please post your comments below and feel free to e-mail me directly if you have any questions. Always great to hear from you!

Happy ventures

Jackie

My Submarine To The Future